Hey y’all how you doing? Hope everyone is Gucci.
So recently I published a post where I spoke about stress and how it seeps into other parts of your life. The thing about stress is that it can be very crippling. When you’re stressed and you feel like everything around you is crashing you tend to let everything crash. You start feeling sorry for yourself, and that is where everything goes downhill.
You fail a test? You feel sorry. You don’t get a job? You wallow in self pity. You have writers block ? You lament to everyone who can hear you. I’m writing this cause I’m guilty of this. I love feeling sorry for myself. I don’t like people feeling bad for me, or seeing me as a victim. I will however do it for myself. I will often let one thing bring me down and never attempt to snap back.
Let me just tell you that’s a terrible way to live life. It’s sad, it makes you sad, it cripples you and you end up way worse than you were before. It doesn’t help that feeling sorry for yourself feels pretty good. You get to put the blame on some external influence and you’re usually absolved of all responsibility. It feels good. It also feels better when you share your problems with people and they tell you the same thing. “It’s not your fault”, “Sorry oh.” Oh and when they tell you what their problems are too? And then everyone has a pity-fest? G-L-O-R-I-O-U-S. It’s not a great way to live life though.
Scratch that. It’s not a way to live life period. Bad things happen, they happen to everyone. You may make a financial decision that will mess things up for you. You may not get that job. You may not pass that test. You may have writers block. You may forget to exercise. There are so many things you may or may not do. So get over it. Get over it.
Everyday that you wallow in self pity is going to be a day that is wasted. A day that you could have used to work on a skill, apply to another job, start saving again, study for the next test, go to the gym.
Don’t get me wrong. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with feeling bad about something that has happened to you. Feel bad. Talk about it. Let it wash over over you, don’t wallow. The problem happens when you let that be the only thing you define yourself as. When you start saying “No one wants to hire me”, instead of “What skills can I develop to make sure I’m the best candidate.”
The thing you have to realize is that the world doesn’t wait for you to bounce back. If something terrible happens in your life the world will keep spinning, it always does. What you decide to do next is what matters the most. Are you going to halt life as you know it forever? Or are you going to see this as a chance to become a better person? I’ve chosen to keep moving with the world, I can’t make your choice for you, but I hope you choose the one that enriches your life.
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